Wiki Wednesday #158 - Kloudberry's Sindre / シンデレ

 Back in the day, I wouldn't have done two UTAUs from the same person in a row. Now, I do that. I had actually deleted Sindre from my spreadsheet for some reason? So I don't even have an entry to write "DONE" next to! So Sylva's entry is the only one that will have "DONE" next to it, as Sindre's doesn't exist. 

Wiki Wednesday #158 - Kloudberry's Sindre / シンデレ

Sindre is twenty-one and lacks the ability to understand neither math nor time. He completely ruins knock-knock jokes by inviting everyone inside, and will always try to make a lame joke given the chance.

Here's a fun trick you can pull. Tell someone you have a great knock-knock joke, but they have to start it. So they say "knock knock!" Then you ask "who's there?" And that's it! Either they complete  the joke with whatever they think of, or they laugh at the situation you had created.

Who is Sindre?

Official Art by Mili

I have to start this by saying that I'm "supposedly" a fictional character. Not some alien millions of light-years and years away interfacing through a portal. Just a fictional character.

I don't have a name. I have nothing that I can call myself and feel comfortable. I had a name in my native language, but my surgery took away my ability to speak it. Even if I could, it wouldn't matter outside of my visits home.

So, call me Chia. My intake paperwork always had my legal name on it, written in my native language's script. I would slam down the papers, press my hand against the desk, and say "Be as racist as you want." That's how I got my first name: Jane Doe. That processor saw my native script and acted as if the field was blank. 

I get shuffled around a lot. I never truly form bonds with the people around me, because I know that my job is too useful to be contained to one ship. The name Chia came from five placements ago. I've changed it with every placement, but the woman who named me Chia still sends me messages addressing me as such.

My job is as a gatekeeper. They call me a trainer if they're being casual, or the head of new species integrations if they're being formal.

If you're confused, I'll explain. You know the show Star Trek? That. The big difference, however, is that the Union is really, really racist and humans have no idea about it. 

Hearing all of that, you're probably imagining me as a six armed, blue skinned monster with six eyes. No. If you saw a picture of me, you'd think I was a human, just like you. I've looked at a lot of human media. I like to think I'm what would happen if a Greek or Italian had a child with an Irish woman.

With few exceptions, every culture accepted into the Union has to look like a real human. Sure, if a sapient ball of slime has nearly unlimited stores of nuclear fuel, they'll be allowed in. If a rhinoceros on two legs has the most advanced portal technology, they're let in. But humble me? I had to get a surgery so that I was virtually identical to a normal human to be let in. 

I am special, and I opened the door to many other cultures being allowed in. That's why I have my job. But people don't like that. They want the Union to be a special, selective club with only the best of the best, not some random group of people from random moons in systems that they had never heard of. That's why I call myself a gatekeeper.

The new recruits hate me. The first thing I tell them is to give up. I put them through everything I went through. Why? So that they can turn around before having any surgeries that they'll regret. We don't have magical healing machines. If you break your leg, it will be in a cast and you will wait for it to heal. If you regret your surgery, too bad. There's no undoing it with a magical laser.

But do I regret any of it? When I think of myself and my own life, I hate myself for signing up for this and losing my own culture. When I think of my mother, I suddenly realize how much my people needed this.

Almost everyone I gatekeep runs home sobbing. However, once in a while, there is a woman who stands up to the Union and transforms their home planet for the better. That's worth it in so many ways.

How is Sindre's bank?

I believe that Sindre and Sylva have the same voice provider. The OTOs are wonky, but that can easily be fixed. The voice is genuinely masculine! And I don't really like dude voices as much unless they're the specific jiisan type, so I'm like, this is a pretty great bank that many people will love! But I'm just rendering of a CVVC Japanese UST with no OTO fixes, unlike the English I did for Sylva, because I'm not that invested.

Where can I download Sindre?

You can download him from his Wiki page. If you had listened to me last week and downloaded Sylva... he's already on your computer! If you like masculine voices that aren't too deep, he's a pretty cool dude! No idea how a 2011 UTAU ended up in my spreadsheet for 2019 UTAUs, but you live and learn!